More or Less Sane
by Ayakaishi Fei
Summary: AU. Evil Vampires, Bloodsucking and a conversation with a Psychiatrist. Guess who's telling the story... Hehe. SLASH
1. Chapter 1

Title: More or Less Sane  
  
Author: FireDemon  
  
Email: Ken_Dai_Love@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: PG13  
  
Category: Romance  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai/Shoujo-ai, Disturbing behaviour.  
  
Summary: AU. Evil Vampires, Bloodsucking and a conversation with a Psychiatrist. Guess who's telling the story... Hehe.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Zoids, if I did Fiona would be passionately in love with Zeke, Raven would be too busy worrying about his sexuality to fight for Prozen, and the Guardian Force would be enthusiastically screwing each other while Moonbay followed them around with a video camera.  
  
"I met him in a nightclub." I force the words out my gaze never faltering.  
  
"I see." The man replies. I feel like launching myself at him and tearing him limb from limb. This is my third session, with my third psychiatrist, and none of them have said anything other then 'I see', or 'How did that make you feel?'  
  
They don't 'see', they couldn't possibly understand. I mean, god, it sounds insane to me and I'm the one who experienced it.  
  
"The music was loud, Fiona had dragged me over to the speakers. She was spouting off about 'feeling' the music."  
  
"And how did that make *you* feel?" The psychiatrist asks, pen posed above his note pad.  
  
"I don't know. It was a favour to Fiona."  
  
"Tell me about Fiona," He orders me, his eyes unreadable behind his glasses.  
  
"Fiona? Well, she's a friend. She's kind of naïve, but not in a bad way. She's very sweet, I used to think I had a crush on her."  
  
"I see." He jots something down on his note pad, completely ignoring the fact that I'm supposed to be explaining what happened in the club, "Explain what you mean be, 'used to think'?"  
  
I breathe in deeply, trying to find the words I need, "Well, she's kind of pretty, you know, pure. Nothing about her is tainted or unclean. When I first met her I found that rather attractive."  
  
"I see. What changed your mind." He asks simply, looking up at me, from beneath his hair.  
  
"He changed my mind." I answer just as simply.  
  
"How?" I can see he's becoming more interested now, still politely aloof, but after meeting Raven I can detect the curiosity in his voice, the interest in his posture.  
  
"After him..." My eyes meet his gleaming darkly, "She just couldn't measure up."  
  
"Couldn't measure up?" He questions, though it's obvious he knows what I mean.  
  
"He was everything she wasn't. Darkly attractive, beautiful even, and sinfully sexy. He oozed sex-appeal and Fiona, well Fiona had trouble understanding the concept of a kiss."  
  
"He confused your perception of your own sexuality?" The man asks me, his question turning the conversation to an issue he'd been trained to handle.  
  
I shake my head, "Not at all. It was simply, after him, anything and everything I'd ever felt for anyone else was suddenly completely insignificant."  
  
"Insignificant?" He questions again.  
  
"No other feeling could compare." I say.  
  
"I see. Do you believe this feeling you felt for him was love?" He asks.  
  
"I don't know," I reply honestly, "At the time, yes, I thought it was love. Now, I'm not too sure. I lusted after him, more then I've ever lusted after anybody in my life."  
  
"Ah, do you often lust after people?"  
  
I shrug, "I suppose so, there was this one time when my best friend hired me a stripper. I lusted after her. And there was a very pretty boy in my class when I was a junior in high school, I suppose I lusted after him too, even though I didn't think I did at the time."  
  
He jots something down on his pad. Probably writing that I'm a nymphomaniac who should be drugged up for his own good.  
  
"Are you a virgin?" His eyes are flat, hidden behind his glasses, I can't see what he's thinking.  
  
"I don't see that it's any of your business, but no, I'm not."  
  
"I see. May I ask about your relationship with your parents?"  
  
I blink, how he's got from my sex life to my parents I have no idea. I open my mouth, to lie, but it isn't the lie that comes out, "My dad works, I don't see him much. My mom was always very busy with the kids, and when they grew up, she fostered more. I have a very big family."  
  
"And how does that make you feel?" He asks.  
  
"It's my life," I reply, biting back my initial reply, "it makes me feel like it's my life."  
  
"I see," He writes something else down. I bet he's saying I'm neglected, and I'm making this whole thing up for the attention.  
  
"I'm not neglected." I say before I can stop myself.  
  
"Did I imply you were?" He asks, "May I ask if you lost your virginity to this stranger you met in the nightclub?"  
  
"No." I say brusquely.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
Well, he did request permission to ask. What did he expect?  
  
"No, I didn't lose my virginity to him." I amend, I don't really like being impolite.  
  
"But you met him in a nightclub, yes?" He brings the conversation back to the starting point.  
  
I nod, "Yes, next to speakers. Fiona was 'feeling' the music, and I was trying to look cool and attractive."  
  
"You were trying to look attractive?" He twists my words. "Don't you think you look attractive when you're not trying?"  
  
"I... That's not what I meant."  
  
"I see," He writes something else down, "Continue."  
  
"Moonbay and Irvine kept plying Fiona and I with drinks. I think she wanted us to get together for some reason, I don't know why, and I was a little tipsy."  
  
"A little tipsy?" He questions, and I feel a red flush spread across my cheeks.  
  
"Well, okay, maybe a little more then tipsy, but I wasn't drunk."  
  
He scribbles for a few seconds, then smiles at me, "Continue."  
  
"Okay, Irvine had spilt some water on Moonbay, and I was staring at her, because her white clubbing shirt had gone see-through, and then I saw him."  
  
"Him?" He questions, and I realise that so far I haven't mentioned his name once.  
  
"Raven. He said his name was Raven."  
  
The man jots that down, and I stare at the paper, I almost feel guilty, as if by giving him my love's name I've committed some terrible crime.  
  
I let my eyes flutter closed as the memories of that night rush back over me, "He was standing in the middle of the crowd, it looked like they were flowing around him. Like he was the only rock in that sea of moving, gyrating dancers. His eyes were sweeping over the crowd, then they met mine, I could see everything in that stare. I shuddered as the stare held, and he gazed into my soul. Then he smiled."  
  
"He smiled?" The man questions, I know he thinks I'm exaggerating, or delusional.  
  
I nod, "Yes. He smiled. It was the kind of smile that burns you, from your lips which tingle in anticipation of the kiss that smile promises to the tips of your suddenly unsteady toes."  
  
"I see." The man says, although of course, he doesn't.  
  
"And then he walked through the throng of dancers, cutting through them like a hot knife through butter, that wicked smile never budging from his inhumanly beautiful face."  
  
"Inhumanly beautiful?" His voice is curious, I suppose in his profession, you have to pick up on every little nuance.  
  
"It was as if he'd been chiselled out of stone. As I said, after him, everyone else just sort of... faded away."  
  
"And after he reached you?" He prompts, too engrossed in my story to stop me now.  
  
"He asked me to dance." I reply, my mind reeling from the incredibly clear memories I have of that night.  
  
"And how did that make you feel?"  
  
"I'm not sure," I'm starting to get used to all his touchy-feely questions, although I still don't like them, "I wasn't drunk, but from the moment I saw him, it was like, have you ever done speed?"  
  
The psychiatrist looks at me in a mixture of horror and surprise.  
  
"When you do speed your brain feels like it's operating really, really fast, and everything's suddenly incredibly clear. Like for you, suddenly putting on your glasses, you know?"  
  
He nods, relaxing slightly when he comprehends what I'm trying to tell him.  
  
"Well, seeing him, it was like the exact opposite. Everything suddenly slowed down, and it was like I was seeing him from underwater or something."  
  
"I see," He replies, despite the fact he quite obviously does not.  
  
"We danced for hours. I don't like dancing, I was only at the club for Fiona, but I danced for hours anyway. I vaguely remember Moonbay and Irvine leaving. They asked me if I wanted to leave."  
  
"I take it you didn't?"  
  
I shake my head, "No, I didn't. He kissed me, and then it was like, everything suddenly sped up. I wasn't underwater any more and he was there."  
  
"I see." He replies.  
  
I shrug, ignoring the temptation to say 'No, you don't'.  
  
"So what happened next?" He's hooked now, I suppose usually his patients spill about their childhood trauma's. My experience is getting to be like a cheap and relatively plotless porno.  
  
"Fiona came looking for me. It turned out the music wasn't the only thing she felt that night," I say caught between bitterness and amusement. I'd really liked her; it kind of hurt that she'd chosen some bimbo over me.  
  
"What do you mean by, 'it wasn't the only thing she felt'?" He asks, flawlessly quoting my words back at me.  
  
"That night she hooked up with some bimbo she'd never even seen before. Reese, or something like that" I shrug again, "I was kind of distracted by the gorgeous bishounen who was nibbling on my neck."  
  
"And how did that make you feel?" He asks  
  
I purposefully misinterpret his question, "Raven sucking on my neck? Pretty damn good actually."  
  
"And what were your feelings towards Fiona?" He inquires, ignoring my remark.  
  
"Well, I was kinda surprised she swung that way, I'd almost convinced myself she was asexual," I joke.  
  
"I see," He jots something down on his notepad, "You feel the need to defend yourself with humour?"  
  
"No!" I shoot back, "I was kind of upset that she'd choose someone over me when I'd liked her for so long, but Raven was way hotter then her so it kinda didn't matter anyway."  
  
"Hmm, tell me more about Raven."  
  
"Alright, he's very good looking," I falter, I know there's more to him then just his looks, and I'm honestly not that shallow, but I'm having trouble thinking what I know about him that I can put into words, "I... He's my soul mate. You know, my dream-guy, even though I didn't know he was until I met him. We just... fit."  
  
He nods, "What happened after Fiona arrived?" He prompts, returning to the previous conversation.  
  
"Well, Reese and Raven went to buy Fiona and I a drink, so we talked. She told me how Reese was the love of her life. She wasn't who I would have pegged for Fiona's soul-mate, but she's nearly as weird as Fi, so, I dunno, they were good together I suppose."  
  
"You suppose?" He asks.  
  
I shrug, "Well yeah, I don't know for sure. I mean, I barely talked to Reese, but she seemed to like Fiona as much as Fi liked her, so I guess they're good for each other."  
  
"Hmm," He scribbles something else on his pad. I feel extremely self- conscious, but talking about it is helping me get my head on straight.  
  
"Fiona and Reese left and Raven and I went back to my place," I falter in my narrative, with the other psychiatrists I'd started here, at the root of the problem with no explanation. I'd given Dr. Kido an explanation but I was still cautious, I didn't want him to dismiss me as a nutcase. I'm sensitive, so sue me.  
  
"Yes?" He prompts, and his eyes fix on me, his pretence of disinterest is long gone.  
  
"I invited him in for coffee, it was about 3, maybe 4 in the morning, I figured sobering up would be a good thing."  
  
He nods. "I see, and after you invited him in?"  
  
"Well, he took a seat on the couch and I sat down next to him, or rather, on top of him," I feel myself blushing again, "So we made out, you know, and then I pulled back to ask him if he wanted something to drink."  
  
The doctor is blushing a little but he prompts me to continue.  
  
My blush deepens, "He smirked, one of those sexy evil smirks that makes you shudder even though it's making you really, really hard. Then he said, 'Well if you're offering...' and then he bit me, on the neck. It wasn't like before when he was just nuzzling, he sunk his fangs and sucked my blood."  
  
He doesn't speak. Have I finally rendered a psychiatrist speechless?  
  
"Are you okay?" I ask hesitantly.  
  
He pulls off his glasses and massages his temples, "I'm fine," his blue eyes meet mine and I can see that he's a little upset.  
  
"What's wrong?" The roles have been reversed now, it's like I'm the psychoanalyst, and he's the nutcase.  
  
"For a while there I'd forgotten I was a psychiatrist. You know, until the whole blood-sucking thing you came off as more or less sane." He replies.  
  
"Oh," I smile, "You can't win 'em all. Thanks for listening to me. I really needed to get that off my chest."  
  
He pauses, and I know he's psyching himself up for something, "So, what happened with you and Raven?" He asks.  
  
I quirk an eyebrow, impressed, "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Just curious," He replies tensely.  
  
"Oh," I smile, "He asked me to move in with him."  
  
"What did you say?"  
  
I smile, showing my fangs, "As soon as I catch my dinner I think I'm going to tell him yes. I just needed to get my head on straight."  
  
His eyes widen and I swoop down on him, moving faster then his pathetic human eyesight can follow, "Thanks again," I say just before I sink my teeth. I can hear my love's husky voice in my head, as I bite,  
  
//Good Hunting Thomas//  
  
Authors Notes: Another entirely queer fic. This one didn't come from a song, although I *do* have the new Silverchair song stuck in my head, but that didn't really inspire this fic.  
  
I also just watched Pearl Harbour which didn't exactly inspire me either, but did make me annoy my family when I chirped, "I understood that!" every time I understood the spoken Japanese. Looks like watching subbed animé is finally paying off.  
  
This fic was mostly inspired by the fact that I met the guy of my dreams. However despite mutual attraction I did nothing because I am dating a friend whom I like, but don't love, and who 'cheated' on me the day before I met the guy I'm head over heels for. Story of my life. Don't ask me how that inspired me to write this, it just did, that's all.  
  
Also, final note, thanks a ton to Naomi Hunter who wrote a Thomas/Raven fic that made enough sense for me to decide to try out the pairing for myself, and to Maelgwyn who told me to read his fic for inspiration (look at what you made me write!) and thanks to Ninetails, cos she reviewed and she's brilliant. ^_^ You guys, and everyone else who reviews my fics are the best, so thanks y'all. 


	2. Chapter 2

Title: More or Less Sane  
  
Author: FireDemon  
  
Email: Ken_Dai_Love@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: PG13  
  
Category: Romance  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai/Shoujo-ai, Disturbing behaviour.  
  
Summary: AU. Evil Vampires, Bloodsucking and a conversation with a Psychiatrist. Guess who's telling the story this time... Hehe.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Zoids, if I did Fiona would be passionately in love with Zeke, Raven would be too busy worrying about his sexuality to fight for Prozen, and the Guardian Force would be enthusiastically screwing each other while Moonbay followed them around with a video camera.  
  
Chapter 2:  
  
"Why am I here? Oh that's an easy one. Thomas told me to come!" I chirp, pleasantly surprised by the question.  
  
Dr Ichijouji seems nice, not what I was expecting. I've always been a little prejudiced against psychiatrists, especially as Thomas seems to find them so distasteful.  
  
He looks a little nervous, I think I'm his first ever patient. He reaches up to brush a strand of hair out of his eyes. He has blue hair, but not blue like Reese's, it's darker, a midnight blue that is nowhere near as attractive or unusual.  
  
"Er, and why did he tell you to come?"  
  
I puzzle over the question for a moment, trying to remember the blonde's exact words, "He told me I should get something off my chest."  
  
The man relaxes a little, "That's probably a good idea. Do you have anything you'd like to talk about? Anything that's bothering you?"  
  
I pause, consider the question, then I smile, "Actually I do."  
  
He settles himself more comfortably, and smiles encouragingly at me, "Go ahead," He prompts.  
  
"Is it wrong to kill other people so that you, yourself, can go on living?" I ask.  
  
His eyes widen, and he shoots up, "What?"  
  
I blink, "Do you wish for me to repeat the question, or was that simply an incredulous exclamation?"  
  
"I..." He takes a deep breath, "I'm sorry. That's a very odd question. Why do you ask?"  
  
"Well..." I begin, then I stop, "Maybe I should start at the beginning."  
  
He nods, "That would be the logical place to begin."  
  
"It began at the nightclub. It was a fairly nice nightclub, as far as I can tell. I don't usually go to nightclubs you see."  
  
He nods again.  
  
"It wasn't my idea to go to the nightclub, but we did have fun there." I inform the man, "We split up almost immediately."  
  
"Why?" He asks.  
  
"I'm afraid I don't understand."  
  
"Why did you split up?"  
  
"Well, privacy in part I suppose. We all had different ideas about how we wanted to spend our night at the club."  
  
"I see," He says and I giggle as it reminds me of Thomas's imitation of the psychiatrist he ate.  
  
"What's so funny?" He questions as I continue to laugh.  
  
"I'm sorry, Thomas was pretending to be a psychiatrist and he kept saying I see, so every time someone says I see, I remember Thomas saying that and I laugh."  
  
"I..." He trails off, "Yes, very good. Why don't you tell me about Thomas?"  
  
"Thomas? Thomas is Thomas. He's very funny, and sweet. I think he's probably my best friend," I smile, "Thomas is hard to describe. He's just... Thomas, that's all."  
  
"I... Uh huh." The psychiatrist scribbles something down on the pad which he's holding.  
  
"Are you drawing a picture? Is that why you wanted to know about Thomas?" I ask.  
  
He looks up, his face turning slightly pink, "No, of course not. Why don't you tell me about what happened at the club?"  
  
"Oh. Okay," I chirp, "I'd dragged Thomas over to the speakers so that he could 'feel' the music with me."  
  
"How exactly do you feel music?" He asks curiously.  
  
"Well..." I blink, "You know. You listen to it, and the beat is under your feet, and your heart beats in time and your head pounds along with the pulsating rhythm. Feeling the music, you know."  
  
He nods, "And then what happened?"  
  
"I... Moonbay brought me a drink of something. It didn't taste brilliant, I think she said it was a cocktail."  
  
"I see" The psychiatrist smiles lightly, and I suppress the laughter I can feel bubbling inside of me.  
  
"I remember dancing with Irvine and Thomas and Moonbay, but Irvine and Moonbay kept giving me drinks, and I kept drinking them, and I kept falling over. And then everyone started calling me a lightweight." I pout angrily at the memory, "Then Irvine spilt something on Moonbay's shirt and she dragged me into the bathroom so that she could change tops."  
  
"And how did that make you feel?" He asks, the words are slightly stiff, as if they've been over-practised.  
  
"Feel? Well I was a little dizzy, but very happy. Then when Moonbay had finally finished in the bathroom I was feeling kind of let down and normal. Things had stopped being funny and unusual."  
  
"Oh," The man hastily writes something in his notebook and I try to lean over to look at it, but he snaps the book shut before I can. "And what about when you returned to the speakers?"  
  
"Well Irvine was still there but apparently Thomas had been asked to dance."  
  
"And how did that make you feel?" He repeats; it reminds me of a broken record, and I have to try hard not to giggle. Thinking about the question does make my amusement disappear.  
  
"Kind of lonely actually. Thomas had someone, and Moonbay and Irvine had each other. I kinda wanted someone to dance with me too."  
  
"Lonely huh?" His violet eyes meet mine, and he smiles, "I know how that feels."  
  
"Yes." I agree, "She looked lonely too. That's why I went and talked to her."  
  
"She?" He questions.  
  
"Reese. My Reese," I smile tenderly, "She's beautiful... unbelievably so... inhumanly so."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"She smiled when I said hello, and slid her arms around my neck without even asking me to dance. And then she kissed me."  
  
"She kissed you?" He asks a little startled.  
  
"Yes. It was my first kiss, and it was incredible."  
  
"You're a lesbian then?" He asks me, voice trembling.  
  
"Not exactly. Lesbian implies interested in girls, and I'm not interested in girls. I'm interested in Reese, and Reese alone." I smile.  
  
"Are you sure you're not insecure about your sexuality?" He questions hopefully.  
  
"There are many things I am uncertain of, but my sexuality is not one of them." I reply firmly, "I love Reese, and nothing else matters."  
  
"Oh," He looks even more nervous, "So, after Reese kissed you, what happened?"  
  
"We kept dancing. It was nice. It was like we were dancing to a song no one else could hear. For the first time in my life there was someone else who could feel the music as I did. Who heard the melodies that the rest of the world ignored. It felt like we were moving in perfect sync. I've never danced like that before, like my partner could hear my thoughts before I had a chance to think them."  
  
He sighs, "That sounds incredible."  
  
"It was," I hasten to assure him. I don't think he's acting like a psychiatrist should any more, he's smiling at me, despite his apprehension, and he's losing himself in my feelings.  
  
"Had you ever loved anyone before you met Reese?" He asks me.  
  
I shake my head, "I used to think I had a crush on one of my school teachers, but that wasn't love. With Reese it was... we fit. We both knew we were meant to be together forever."  
  
"That's so romantic," He murmurs almost to himself, "Are you still together?"  
  
"Of course!" I declare, "Reese would never leave me. I'm too much a part of her, and she's too much a part of me."  
  
"So what happened next?" He prompts.  
  
"I remembered that Thomas and I were supposed to be going home together, so Reese told me she'd help me look for him."  
  
"Did you find him?" His voice is soft, as if he's afraid to break the spell I'm weaving with my voice.  
  
"Yes. We found him. He was dancing with Reese's bond-brother, Raven. Reese and I interrupted them, and Reese made Raven escort her to the bar so that they could get Thomas and I a drink. I'd mentioned I was thirsty earlier, and Reese had remembered. While they were gone Thomas and I talked."  
  
"What did you talk about?" His notebook rests on the floor beside him, completely forgotten.  
  
"He asked who Reese was and I told him that she was my soul mate, my one true love. He asked if I was sure, and I reassured him that I was positive on the matter. He told me about Raven, and I encouraged him. If he was besotted with my soul mate's bond-brother then who was I to doubt their love."  
  
The doctor smiled, "I couldn't agree more."  
  
I return the smile, "Reese and Raven returned with our drinks and Reese greeted me with another one of those earth-shattering kisses I mentioned earlier. Thomas looked a little shell-shocked. I'd never even admitted to having a crush before let alone kissed someone in front of him. I think he thought I was joking about Reese."  
  
Violet eyes glittered with amusement, "I can imagine. Did you two stay at the club?"  
  
I shake my head, "No. After I finished my drink Reese bid Raven goodbye and we left the club. It was about 3am in the morning, and Reese decided we should go back to her place."  
  
"And you went?" He questions slightly surprised.  
  
"Of course, she's my soul mate, I trust her completely." I reply just as surprised.  
  
"So after you got back to her place what happened?"  
  
"She gave me another drink, of orange juice, and then she led me into her bedroom. She was so gentle, her fingers soft and cool beneath my own as she tenderly placed me onto her bed and straddled me."  
  
I look up to see the colour rush to my psychiatrists cheeks, he coughs and says something that sounds a lot like continue, so I do.  
  
"We kissed again, softly at first, and then she deepened it, and it felt like she was the only thing keeping me from drowning in a sea of passion."  
  
I probably sound like some cheap romance, but every cliché I use fits my feelings so well.  
  
"Her lips kissed a burning trail to my earlobe, where she paused to whisper that she loved me, then she sunk her teeth into my neck."  
  
I hear a choked sound that I assume is Dr. Ichijouji, but I don't stop my narrative.  
  
"It was incredible, the most intense pleasure I have ever felt came from that bite. I could feel my blood disappearing into her mouth, but I didn't care. Being changed into a vampire by my soul-mate was an experience I would pay to repeat. Everything about it was pleasurable. Even the pain when she sank her teeth was pleasurable. It was like sex, only better. There is nothing like being connected to the person you adore on so deep a level."  
  
My shrink's eyes are wide and filled with horror, "Y-you think that you're a vampire?"  
  
"I am a vampire," I smile, stressing the word am.  
  
"Oh," His voice is weak, almost too weak.  
  
"So, having heard my tale, tell me, is it wrong of me to kill other people so that I can go on living?" I tilt my head, "The question has been bugging me."  
  
"I..." He falters, "Everybody kills to survive, it's a part of life."  
  
"Death is a part of life?" I question, meditating on the idea, "So it is not wrong?"  
  
"I..."  
  
I smile, "I see."  
  
Swiftly I stand, "Thomas was correct. Therapists are useful." I smile, "Thank you for your help."  
  
"Wait!" He cries, "I... Where are you going?"  
  
"Home, to Reese, and my family." I bare my fangs, "Why?"  
  
"I want to know. Reese turned you into a vampire, right?"  
  
My brow wrinkles, "Correct..."  
  
"...And now you live with her, right?"  
  
"Her, and Thomas and Raven."  
  
"So you don't have a problem with her being a vampire, or being a vampire yourself?"  
  
"No. I was alarmed by the way others must die for us to live, but you have helped me."  
  
His eyes widen, "What do you mean?"  
  
I turn, "Death is a part of life Dr. Ichijouji, now that I've accepted that I can get on with my life."  
  
I turn and walk out of the door, ignoring both the stunned counsellor and the rustle that means one of my room-mates has arrived to take care of him.  
  
I smile at the secretary on my way out, "Talking about your problems really does help," I chirp, "By the way, you look delicious, how do you feel about dinner?"  
  
The girl looks up, "Well, I get off in about 5 minutes. Dinner sounds great."  
  
"Great," I echo, smiling at the pale skinned brunette.  
  
I really am quite hungry, but eating Dr Ichijouji, that would have been rude.  
  
Authors Notes: I hope you all figured out it was Fiona. I didn't mention her name, but it was from Fiona's perspective.  
  
This one's for Naomi Hunter, who told me I HAD to write more of this fic, because there was so much more I could do with it. Also Plink, thanks for reviewing, and Maelgwyn, here's the second chapter. By the way, I'm from South Australia I think it was you who asked. There seem to be a lot of Zoids writers who live in Australia *grins*.  
  
I intended it as a one-shot, but I figured I could try something else. This is more a companion piece, but if you like it I can write the last two point of view's as the next two chapters, explaining what's going on from Reese and Raven's POV's. If I do, it won't just be what happened at the club, it'll go more into what happened afterwards. What do you guys think?  
  
So should I write the other two perspective's, or do the other POV's just confuse things? 


	3. Chapter 3

Title: More or Less Sane  
  
Author: FireDemon  
  
Email: Ken_Dai_Love@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: R (Ooh, lookie, it jumped. Bad FireDemon)  
  
Category: Romance  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai/Shoujo-ai, VERY disturbing behaviour. Blood 'n stuff. LONG!!! (Well longer than Ch 2.)  
  
Summary: AU. Evil Vampires, Bloodsucking and a conversation with a Psychiatrist. Guess who's telling the story this time... Hehe.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Zoids, if I did Fiona would be passionately in love with Zeke, Raven would be too busy worrying about his sexuality to fight for Prozen, and the Guardian Force would be enthusiastically screwing each other while Moonbay followed them around with a video camera.  
  
Chapter 3:  
  
"Death is a part of life Dr. Ichijouji, now that I've accepted that I can get on with my life." Fiona explains as she calmly leaves the room.  
  
I step out of the shadows, "You must be Fiona's psychiatrist. A pleasure I'm sure."  
  
His violet eyes lock on me and he lets out a soft gasp of shocked recognition. Not of me, but of what I am. A creature of the night: A vampire.  
  
"What are you doing here?" He asks his eyes wide.  
  
"Thomas told us that his 'talking-man' helped him to sort out his feelings about Raven, and about being a vampire. You seemed to have helped Fiona. Now you will assist me, either in your capacity to listen to problems and resolve them, or your capacity as my dinner."  
  
"I..." He takes a deep breath, obviously trying to gather his courage, "Why don't you sit down and tell me about yourself?"  
  
I circle him like a bird circling its prey and he wilts slightly, "I'd rather stand. If you don't mind."  
  
"I *do* mind!" He tells me sharply as I continue to circle, "What were you, a vulture in a past life?"  
  
I laugh, "You're rather amusing, for a human. I'll humour you talking man, but don't get too comfortable."  
  
His face pales, "Of course. Why don't you sit down, make yourself comfortable and tell me about yourself."  
  
Moving faster then his puny eyes can follow, I leap up and land in the seat before he even has time to turn around. His face pales even further and I smirk contentedly. I must say I enjoy using my powers for intimidation.  
  
"Now, where to begin?" I ask myself flippantly.  
  
"Perhaps the beginning would be a good place?" Fiona's talking-man suggests softly.  
  
I raise an eyebrow, "The Beginning. There is no such thing as the beginning, however I shall give you a beginning, if you like."  
  
He nods; I can feel my words have made him curious. A strange gift, or curse, for a vampire to have. Empathy: The ability to sense and experience the feelings of others. Yet, it is an ability I have nevertheless.  
  
"I have been alive for more years then I care to remember, thanks to my immortality. I was 23 when my sire, a vampire who went by the name, Prozen, transformed me into the creature I am today. For my bond-brother Raven and I, Prozen was like a father. I'd never had a father before, I come from a long line of what I suppose would today be called witches or psychics, but it makes little difference anyway. My mother gave me to him-"  
  
"Gave you to him? How does one 'give' a person?" He asks. I feel his horror laced shock, and I smile, perhaps a little too coldly.  
  
"Much in the same way as one gives anything. For a witch and a vampire the exchange of individuals is common practise."  
  
"I see," He whispers, already disturbed by my tale.  
  
"I was 13 at the time, barely more then a child, and my future bond-brother was 17, and had been for well over half a century. Prozen doted on us, as if we were his children. He gave us everything our selfish hearts desired; he took us hunting when he went, even though he'd not yet changed me. He was a good father, and we loved him, with all our crooked little hearts." I look up and smirk at the therapist.  
  
"You really loved him?" His voice is soft, as if he's yearning to understand.  
  
"Yes. I loved him. He gave me the gift and the curse of being the creature I am today. And for that I will love him and hate him more than any other on this plane of existence until the day somebody shoves a piece of wood through my black little heart, and burns my body to ash."  
  
Waves of sadness and sympathy wash over me, and my eyes fix on the psychiatrist in surprise, I can see tears in his violet eyes. He feels sorry for me.  
  
"It is a gift like no other, little mortal. It is a gift of love, twisted love. Few mortals ever understand that sort of love."  
  
"It is the kind of love that made my father hit my mother to arouse himself," He tells me, voice trembling as he discloses his greatest secret to a vampire he does not even like.  
  
I smile, "Yes, little one. That is the kind of love I mean. You are a clever little morsel, talking-man."  
  
He smiles back weakly, "Thanks, I think."  
  
"I was 23 when he changed me, 23 years old to the day. I had gained full mastery of my powers, and he decided he was ready to introduce me to his world. I should tell you that Prozen never did anything by halves, he was an exhibitionist to the extreme."  
  
The man on the chair smiles at me, it never ceases to amaze me how effortlessly we vampires can control humans, play with their emotions, their minds, if you like.  
  
"It's impossible to describe what that first night was like, what that first taste of blood was akin to, how it felt to have Prozen drink my blood, no human experience is comparable. I heard Fiona try to describe it to you..."  
  
"That was confidential!" He gasps; trying to struggle out of the haze my voice has lulled him into.  
  
"I'm sure she didn't mind. As I was saying," I smirk at him, enjoying his sulky displeasure, "I overheard Fiona describing it to you, she was so close to describing it perfectly, yet so completely far away. It *is* intimate, and I suppose it is similar to sex, yet so much deeper, so much more intense, and so much more pleasurable. There is a sexual aspect to it, yet it's more then that. It's instinct and primal lust for survival. It's submission if you're the victim, dominance if you're the hunter. It's incredible."  
  
"Would you... Will you... drink my blood?" He stutters, half afraid, half longing. He appears to have changed his mind about being my dinner. I really do love being a vampire; humans are such fun to play with.  
  
"Perhaps, if I'm hungry. I rather like you mortal. Do you have a name?" I ask teasingly.  
  
"It's Ken." He replies, those huge violet pools fixed on me adoringly, I think I've completely mesmerised him.  
  
"Well Ken, shall I continue?"  
  
He nods, and I lean back and recommence my tale,  
  
"After he'd changed me he threw a masque, a masked ball, I suppose you would call it. He invited every socialite, every whore he could hire, and every vampire whose company he enjoyed and he introduced me to his society, by giving me my pick of victims. Between us, we spilt the blood of every mortal there. My bond-brother and I fed like we had never fed before. The first drink was so tantalising, the second so unsatisfactory. As I said, our father liked to make a spectacle of himself and his family, and he thrived on overindulgence."  
  
My mortal looks caught between the urge to throw up and the infinitely more desirable urge to hear more of my tale.  
  
"Does my talk of carnage disturb you little morsel? Perhaps I should move on?" I suggest.  
  
"I'd appreciate it," He replies, still slightly pale. I smirk, showing my fangs as I consider what to speak of next.  
  
"Things changed after that night, the balance of power in our pack was different after I started actively hunting. And of course, Hiltz came home."  
  
"Hiltz?" He asks curiously, his violet eyes fixed on me.  
  
"My father's lover: His bond-mate. He returned to us with gifts for Prozen, Raven and I, extravagant gifts for the lover he hadn't seen in years, the child he'd helped Prozen raise, and the girl he'd never met... My family was finally complete."  
  
"Sounds nice..." He tells me wistfully.  
  
I shrug, "At first it was nice, but Hiltz thought Prozen was spoiling us. And they treated us like children, their children, but children nevertheless. 200 years is a long time to be treated like a kid, and naturally Raven and I got very, very sick of it. We drew away from our sires, and we began to plot against them. Hiltz because we hated him, and Prozen because he had picked Hiltz above us."  
  
"He'd picked Hiltz above you... what do you mean?" He asks, confused.  
  
"He loved Hiltz more, he chose Hiltz to warm his bed, and share his blood," I snarl coldly, "He chose Hiltz to be his lover."  
  
"I...But...You... I thought you said you saw Prozen as a Father, you speak of him as your father." He sounds bewildered, more so then before.  
  
"He was our father, but we loved him, and he chose Hiltz. Hiltz who was not beautiful, who treated us as if we were less then he. We were jealous. We could have warmed his bed and shared his blood, but he chose Hiltz."  
  
He looks slightly sick, he doesn't seem to realise that we vampires are a perverted race, embittered and completely immoral. All vampire relationships are twisted, there is no such thing as a simple parent-child relationship, the blood-sharing is to a certain degree sexual, no matter how young the child.  
  
"I hated Hiltz, more then I hated my father, more then I hated my mother and more then I hated myself. So, my bond-brother and I plotted, and together we contrived a ruse. A clever ruse: We drugged the blood of a pretty virgin boy, the type of victim Hiltz can't resist, and when Hiltz was docile from the poison he'd inadvertently consumed I smiled prettily at him, and ripped out his still beating heart."  
  
My human's face turns green, his eyes huge in that pale face, those green tinged lips clenched closed, and I smile, coldly amused.  
  
"Then, before his eyes had time to glaze, I ate it, making sure to lick my fingers clean-"  
  
The psychiatrist gags and promptly throws up everything he's eaten today, while I watch impassively.  
  
"S-sorry," He croaks, "But that's very messed up."  
  
"I'm a vampire little morsel, I'm supposed to be twisted, you'd do well to remember that."  
  
"R-right," He replies hoarsely  
  
"Now, where was I? Ah yes, after Raven and I had killed Prozen and Hiltz we ran, we sold our fathers properties, and used the money to flee from Paris where our sires had brought us up."  
  
"You're French...?" He asks, and I giggle. It's been a long time since anyone asked me that.  
  
"Oui, je suis français," I confirm, "Although, I have not considered myself such in many, many years. Very few mortals ever pick up on my accent, and Raven has never needed to bring it up."  
  
"Oh," He replies softly, "I see. I couldn't pick your accent, I just picked that you had one."  
  
"Yes, well," I smile, "As I said, it has been many, many years. After Paris, we went to Belgique;" I break off mildly annoyed, "I mean Belgium, and then to New Orléans, in America. We travelled to Japan about 17 years ago, after my bond-brother learnt the language and became obsessed with the Japanese culture."  
  
"So you've only been in Japan for 17 years? You speak the language remarkably well," He compliments me. I shrug,  
  
"I have a knack with languages. I have yet to encounter one I cannot learn. I suppose everybody has their little quirks, learning languages is mine. I believe that is the only reason I am grateful to Prozen for changing me. Had I been mortal, I would not have had the chance to learn so many languages."  
  
He makes a soft murmur of agreement, so I continue with my narrative. The more I speak, the more I long to speak. To tell the whole sordid tale. Well, perhaps not all of it, but the parts that bother me. The parts I could never tell Raven, and the parts I would never impose upon my sweet Fiona.  
  
"We fed from the unwanted children of the streets at first, Raven and I would seduce them to our lair, and feed them whatever they most desired, and then we would drink from them, and burn their broken, empty bodies to ash."  
  
He looks sick again, but he's still enthralled. I feel the same half-guilt I once felt when I coerced my victims into enjoying my ruthless ministrations. I will not lie, I was never reluctant to kill. From my first drink of blood I have been addicted, to the hunt, to the rush, and to the intimacy of the act. I never claimed to be a nice person.  
  
"You look ill again morsel. I will simply summarise those 17 years by saying we never wanted for anything, particularly not food. We drank what we needed to survive, and we never hesitated," He's staring into my eyes, almost like a lover would, not because he loves me of course, but because I am slowly making him mine. That is what we vampires do, whether we wish to or not.  
  
"You never hesitated... you never regretted all the deaths you caused...?" He leaves the question hanging.  
  
"Why should I have? They were mortal, and therefore they would one-day die. I am immortal, I shall live for all eternity."  
  
"Doesn't that ever bother you? That you'll never die?"  
  
I pause, a question I have many times considered has been posed, and I give the answer I could never give to any other who might ask,  
  
"There have been times, in my life, when the idea of eternity, seemed, temporarily, unbearable. I will not lie, there have been times when I have longed for death, and even times when I have actively sought it. You are right to think that immortality is not all péches et créme."  
  
"Peaches and cream," He corrects absently, and I nod impassively.  
  
"After Fiona, however, I realised there were perks I had not considered. The bond I share with her is deepened by our mutual nature. It sickens you, this nature of mine, does it not?" I ask  
  
He flushes, "Not really. I just..."  
  
I smirk, "It repulses you, as once it might have repulsed me, had I placed a higher value on human life."  
  
He nods, "It never disgusted you, did it?"  
  
I consider his query, how inhuman I must seem to him that he should ask such a question. "Prozen... was very beautiful. Beautiful as I am beautiful."  
  
"Oh," He replies, his violet eyes agreeing with my statement. That my statement might be considered egotistical occurs to me, and I look towards the shadowed mirror hidden in the crook of his office. My reflection stares back at me, my blue hair brushes my shoulders, I'd forgotten how short it was. When I was younger, mortal, I'd had long hair, hip length almost, before I'd cut it. My green eyes seem uncannily bright, unnatural, like my chiselled features. My skin is too pale, luminescent yet strangely attractive. I'm beautiful, because of what I am. Not because I was a beautiful mortal, but because I am undead, and to those who aren't the beauty I have seems unattainable. I don't explain this to my talking-man. I don't think I can. I pick up where I left off,  
  
"I loved him because he was beautiful, and because I loved him, he did not... disgust me. He was beautiful, and I have always... appreciated beautiful things," I smile coldly at him, "But there is beauty in all things, even my murdered victims are in some way beautiful. Perhaps if I changed you, you would see past your revulsion of the act and you would see the addictive beauty of death. Or perhaps you would simply become that which we night creatures both loathe and love, a reluctant killer. A human vampire."  
  
I tilt my head, "The idea tempts me. I should like to see which you would become. Which do you think, my tender morsel," I breathe in deeply, inhaling the scent of warm human blood, and clean skin, "Would you refuse to kill, or would the blood lust become an addiction?"  
  
He stares at me unspeaking, lost in my voice and my eyes, and my memories, and I smile, remembering.  
  
"I would make it good for you, if I drank your blood, mon petit." I promise.  
  
"I..." His soft voice is hesitant, "Just keep talking."  
  
"Such conviction, mon chere," I laugh, "but I'll continue, if that's what you wish. A long time ago I accepted that I am what I am, and I embraced the darkness that was a part of who I was, so, when I came here, and killed so many, I did not lament their deaths. And yet, I could not bring myself to kill Fiona. My sweet beautiful Fiona, whom I could not kill, but dared not leave untouched."  
  
"So you did neither," He sums up.  
  
"Yes," I reply, noting with annoyance that my accent is more pronounced, thanks to my poking around in my memories, remembering things that should have been long dead. "Instead I took her blood into myself, and gave her my corruption. Her blood was sweet, intoxicating, and her mind was bright and pure. Tasting her was a high the like of which I have never before or since experienced. Even the physical act of intimacy between us cannot compare to that first taste of innocence, and the perverse pleasure of corrupting my innocent soulmate. I soiled her, corrupted her, in every sense of the word. I made her mine, and I made her dark, yet there is still an innocence about her, that is sickeningly sweet, yet undeniably... Fiona. It makes me ache all over to know that virtue is mine to take over and over again, every time I make love to her in a darkened alley, every time I see her kill, I remember that once she was pure, and I took that purity from her and made her what she is."  
  
His eyes are wide, he doesn't seem to understand that vampire love is contradictory, and almost violent in its intensity.  
  
"I love her, and I love being the source of her corruption, but when she is fully corrupted, she will no longer be the Fiona I love, and for that, I will hate myself for all eternity, for she is the only thing that gives my life meaning."  
  
"If you love her now, surely you will love her, even if she changes. She'll still be Fiona," He comforts.  
  
I shrug, "I suppose. But it is her innocence that I love, that I lust after, as well as her body, and her soul. I would love her still if she were like me, evil, but she would not be Fiona, and therefore I would not love her as Fiona."  
  
"Oh. Then maybe you should just love her while you can, and let the future be the future. Who knows, maybe you'll be wrong about her changing."  
  
"You are a clever little morsel talking man," I muse, rather impressed, "And I am curious, pet. You never did answer my question."  
  
"Which question?" He replies, understandably confused. I'm releasing my hold on his mind; I want him to be lucid when I drink.  
  
"If I changed you, my sweet," My cold lips brush his neck as I move, faster then he can see, to stand behind him, "Would you refuse to kill, or would the blood lust become an addiction?"  
  
"I..." His head lolls, his breathing uneven, "I..."  
  
"Well if you can't tell me, I'll have to find out on my own."  
  
He lets out a slight whimper as my teeth sink into his neck, and I drink deeply. He's a useful creature, this 'psychiatrist'. Perhaps my bond brother will tell this little man all the dirty secrets hiding in his brain. I hope so, for I love him, and this talking man has done wonders for my heavy heart.  
  
His blood's not too bad either.  
  
I bite my wrist, and hold it out for the young doctor to drink from. His eyes are slightly glazed, but he drinks.  
  
And as he drinks I remember, this is what my sire did to me, and one day, this child that I am creating, will give this curse to a child of his very own. And my corruption will spread.  
  
I suppose I had no need to tell this child of mine about the club, or my reckless decisions to change not only my beautiful soulmate, but also a psychiatrist who knows all my secrets. I draw my wrist away, pushing the man out of my embrace, tenderness and hatred mix. He is no longer innocent, but his innocence is mine.  
  
He looks at me through his damp, slightly blood smeared bangs, my blood staining his lips. I smile coldly,  
  
"Come Ken. We're going home."  
  
Authors Notes: I got told chapter 2 was light and fluffy compared to chapter 1. This is my return to darkness. Lookie, blood, gruesomeness, and semi-insane Reese. But no Reese/Raven-ness. I finally saw an episode with them two together, Raven taking care of injured Resse, but if I can blatantly ignore the fact that Matt marries Sora in Digimon (He loves Tai I tell you, Tai - not Sora), then I can delude myself about zoids too. It also gave me the whole Reese-hating-Hiltz thing *grins*.  
  
*Huggles Reese* Innit she cute? By the way, Reese does have a slight French accent in this, and her pronunciation of Paris is Pahr-ee, because I wince whenever anyone says Par-iss. I think Reese would be hot with a French accent (Think Lestat in Queen of the Damned *drools*). Besides if people can like Karl and Thomas then I can like Reese (And Rei from EVA, and that hot silver-haired star-scout. Well he's only a chick when he transforms, but he's majorly spunky) Reese is a hottie, but she should NOT be with Raven. Don't ask me how that works. ^_^'  
  
Next chapter will be Ravens POV, if you guys want me to write it, and will probably be darker still. And it will have a return to yaoi!  
  
Fiona's chapter was lighter because to begin with, she's not an angsty person. Also, I'm trying to vary this a little bit. Who wants to read the same thing over and over again?  
  
I hope I haven't bored anyone with the other two perspective's, they are an important part of the story (I'm not just getting off on the lesbianism), I'm building this up so that I can write Raven's chapter, he's probably going to be my favourite. Unfortunately, given that I just started year 12, and am taking 5 VERY hard subjects and I'm gonna get a job, my writing is gonna suffer, so the next chapter will probably be on hold till next holidays, unless I get a day off when I've finished my homework and feel like writing. Sorry you guys.  
  
Also I wanna thank Maelgwyn who reviewed (and wrote that really cool fic where Reese/Ryss was HOT and Thomas had a super-cute boyfriend ^_^'), and Diamond Dew (whose work I *still* worship) 


	4. Chapter 4

Title: More or Less Sane  
  
Author: FireDemon  
  
Email: Ken_Dai_Love@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: R  
  
Category: Romance  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai/Shoujo-ai, VERY disturbing behaviour. Blood 'n stuff.  
  
Summary: AU. Evil Vampires, Bloodsucking and a conversation with a Psychiatrist. Guess who's telling the story this time... Hehe.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Zoids, if I did Fiona would be passionately in love with Zeke, Raven would be too busy worrying about his sexuality to fight for Prozen, and the Guardian Force would be enthusiastically screwing each other while Moonbay followed them around with a video camera.  
  
Chapter 4:  
  
"I have no need to get anything off my chest, child, pester your mistress if you must, but leave me out of your games, I have neither the desire nor the inclination to share whatever plagues my heavy heart with one of my bond-sisters 'pet' vampires," I hiss. Reese's reluctant-killer looks hurt by my words, his violet eyes fixed innocently on me. Thomas rests a hand on the shoulder of Reese's newborn 'child', and smiles,  
  
"Hey, don't worry. Raven's just not in a good mood. Reese and Fiona are off doing... whatever it is they do together," He pulls a face, "Do you want me to take you out hunting?"  
  
I scowl, Thomas is my bond-mate, not this upstart child's.  
  
"I... Yeah, I suppose so. I haven't really eaten anything lately," He admits sheepishly. Stupid child.  
  
"Oh, that's terrible. You have to eat, starving yourself isn't going to help anything," Thomas chides gently, steering the boy towards the door.  
  
This is the last straw, I stand and push past the two angrily, "I'm hunting if anyone wants to know," I hiss and stalk out of the door.  
  
"Don't you want to come with us?" Thomas asks gently, his green eyes searching out mine beseechingly.  
  
I ignore him and stomp out of the house. I feel like my position has been usurped. Very few Vampires ever form covens larger then four for the simple reason that clashes between two night creatures are sure to get messy.  
  
I can't decide whether or not I want to leave my coven... my family behind. I pledged that I would protect them, but not if they don't want me.  
  
I curse, as always, Reese has spoken prophetically, a lifetime of carrying these stupid problems around is taking its toll.  
  
I need to talk to someone, how did Thomas put it? I need to get my head on straight.  
  
I hear Thomas and the brat talking softly behind me and I leap out of their path. There's no way in hell I'm going to spill my problems to that half- breed. I can find my own... whatever they are. Talking men: Cyclists.  
  
I don't need any help from anyone, least of all one of my bond-sister's tag- alongs. I can find my own talking man to help me decide whether to leave, and then I can eat him, if I'm hungry.  
  
I reach the park, and spot the man sitting behind a tiny stall with my superior eyesight. I smirk coldly, reading the messy characters scrawled across a piece of cardboard, and crookedly tacked onto the table,  
  
'Zen Fortune Telling, Talk to a Psychic'  
  
I feel a brief surge on contempt for my bond sister, I've found my very own talking man in less then half the time it took her to make an appointment. He's no Thomas but I'd pick him over that mongrel she dragged home any day.  
  
"Good morning," I greet, inclining my head just enough to be polite.  
  
The man, the boy really, looks up through his mess of burgundy brown hair, his chocolate eyes wide with shock.  
  
"Are you a... customer?" He breathes.  
  
"Indeed," I reply smirking.  
  
His face falls, "My sister just took her lunch break. I'm only watching the stand till she gets back. If you don't want to wait-"  
  
I cut him off, the senseless rambling of others has never entertained me in the slightest. I like everything to be neat, and clear cut. I don't need to know my victims or to torture them. It is enough that I have eaten, without being uselessly sentimental.  
  
"I will talk to you."  
  
"But... I'm not... I don't-"  
  
"My name is Raven," I begin, cutting him off once more.  
  
"I'm Daisuke, my friends call me Dai," He replies, sticking out his hand.  
  
I bend and kiss it, continentally, my lips twitching as he recoils, snatching his hand back as if my lips are poisonous.  
  
"What the hell was that?" He asks.  
  
"I was simply, saying hello. Times have certainly changed since when I was young."  
  
His brown eyes fix on my pale face and he blinks, "You sound like my Ojiisan," He complains and my lips twitch again. For a mortal he's certainly amusing, although he has nothing on my Thomas, but perhaps... An idea forms in my head.  
  
"My apologies, Daisuke, perhaps it would help if I explained?"  
  
"Erm, I guess," He replies, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. My eyes narrow, usually by now I'd have managed to entrance my victim. I suppose this 'psychic' is simply too stupid for the mesmerisation to take affect.  
  
"When I was... young, I lived in a place called Europe. Well it wasn't called Europe then, but it is now. I lived in a tiny little hut with my mother and father in the countryside. Just before my fifth birthday my village was attacked and my mother and father were killed. I think I cried, I can't really remember, it seems a lifetime ago."  
  
I look up, meeting his eyes, he looks interested, his head resting on his palm as he listens intently, but he's not completely entranced. In fact he's only mildly enthralled at best.  
  
"My parents are dead too," He smiles tentatively, "I was only two, and I didn't really understand. My sister and my obasan moved in together and raised me between them. Who looked after you after your parents died?"  
  
I shrug; oddly touched by the fact he's sharing his past with me. "One of the old women in my village survived, and I moved in with her for about a year and a half. She made me do all her fetching and carrying, which rather annoyed me. So I ran away."  
  
He makes a muffled sound of surprise, which I wonder at until I realise what should have been obvious, at 6 years old I still should have had someone to take care of me. I smile,  
  
"I wasn't alone for long, I found my way to the city, it had a name, but I can barely recall the name, and I doubt it would interest you at any rate. I call it a city, but in truth, it was barely a hundredth of the size of Tokyo. The streets were cobbled, and there were horse-drawn carriages, something I'd never seen before, given that I'd grown up in the country. It was because of my awe of these carriages that I met Prozen. The man I was to one day call father. It was foggy, and I had stumbled onto the cobbled street without realising it. When the horse-drawn carriage thundered down the road towards me, only just visible through the fog, I could not bring myself to move. He... Prozen... saved my life. And then he took me to the town-house where he lived and fed me, his crimson red eyes never budging from my face. I think I entranced him almost as much as he entranced me. After I had eaten, he led me to his bedroom and bid me sleep on his bed. When I woke up the next morning, he had not moved from the chair at my bedside, his eerie blood-red eyes were still fixed on me, and his pale icy cold hand still rested on my brow."  
  
"Dude!" My enthusiastic listener exclaims, "That's freaky. Like molestation or something. I mean, dude!"  
  
I smile tolerantly, "I was startled by his presence, but he had saved my life, so I was grateful, and as time passed, I came to understand what he was."  
  
"What? A paedophile?" My big-mouthed human suggests.  
  
"Close. My unexpected benefactor was not a child-molester, he was a vampire." I smirk.  
  
"Dude!" My human repeats again, his chocolate eyes growing wide in his head.  
  
"Indeed," I say, smirking, "I grew to love him, perhaps more then a child should love the man it calls father, but I... believe he shared my feelings, so there was no problem there. It was only after Hiltz started to take an interest in the fact that Prozen was so enchanted with me that things began to become problematic."  
  
"Dude, you lost me. Who the hell was Hiltz?"  
  
"Hiltz was my fathers bond-mate, his boyfriend I suppose you would say," I muse.  
  
"He had a boyfriend, and he was molesting you. Geez, what a pervert."  
  
I laugh, a rich sweet sound which surprises me, I'd forgotten I still could laugh. "Not quite little one. His interest in me was not sexual, it was more, enchantment. I suppose even as a child, I was beautiful, as it were."  
  
"Yeah," The redhead breathed, "You are."  
  
Finally, perhaps the human was a little slow, but like the rest of his pathetic breed he'd succumbed to my 'charms'.  
  
Daisuke shook his head, a faint blush colouring his cheeks - How sweet; he was embarrassed.  
  
"Are you attracted to me, little mortal?"  
  
The child's face turns bright red, "Y... No... ah, I mean, what I meant to say was, ah..."  
  
"Yes, or No, it's a simple question," I ask in amusement, so flustered for such a simple question.  
  
"Well, do you think I'm good-looking?" The boy defends himself.  
  
I smirk, "I think you look absolutely delicious."  
  
"Oh god," Moaned the boy, covering his flaming cheeks with his hand, "What happened to the story?"  
  
I laugh, and pick up where I left off, "We spent, perhaps, 10 years in London, Hiltz, Prozen and I, and as I grew from a child to a killer, my fathers bond mate grew less interested in my father and more interested in me."  
  
"Woah! Sick dude! How old was this Hiltz guy anyway?"  
  
It takes me a moment to calculate, "256, when I met him. I was of course 7 at the time. Prozen taught me to hunt in the back alleys of London, and I was a killer long before I was a vampire. Hiltz used to read to me at night, I would sit on his lap while he admired my human warmth and beauty."  
  
"Ookay," The human says doubtfully, "Is it just me, or was there something going on with that weirdo Hiltz."  
  
I smile indulgently, for such an idiot this human seems surprisingly insightful, "Much as I'd like to say no, I can't."  
  
"Eew!"  
  
I shrug, "Indeed. I was 17 when he finally made his move, after 10 years of cuddles that went a little too long, and touches that went a little too low."  
  
The human winces.  
  
"He waited until Prozen was out. I highly suspect he'd been planning this for a long time. He was sipping blood out of a crystal goblet, sharing the warm liquid with me as we 'snuggled'." I say the word distastefully, even the memory disgusts me, "His hands kept creeping lower, he'd done this before, but this time it was different, and I could tell. It wasn't that I disliked Hiltz, or even what he was doing, but I'd always seen he and Prozen as my fathers, and it was not until I tried to push him away that I realised that this time he wasn't planning on stopping. He was skilled, I'll give him that, but he was also cold, and he hurt me. I think he claimed to love me somewhere in there, just before he changed me. He never wanted Prozen, or anyone, to possess me as he had, to know my warmth as he had. And as I lay spent on the bed he drank from me, and made me the creature I am today." I pause to look at the human. His mouth is hanging open, what was that saying Fiona so often uses.  
  
"Catching flies?" I ask.  
  
His mouth snaps shut, "Dude," He manages through his shock.  
  
"When Prozen arrived home the next morning, he and Hiltz fought as they'd never fought before. Prozen even drew Hiltz's blood, an action I'd never seen my normally placid vampire father take. Hiltz defended himself of course, tried to put the blame on me. Prozen told him to leave then, and to never come back."  
  
My human lets out a cheer, "Whoo! Go Prozen! It's about time he got rid of that sleaze."  
  
I give a small smile, it does feel good to get this off my chest.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Asks a familiar voice.  
  
I turn to see the blazing chocolate brown eyes glaring at me, and give the girl my most charming smile, "Oh this and that. You know how it is Witchling."  
  
Her eyes flicker to my mortal, "Daisuke get away from him."  
  
The boy tilts his head and looks at me, "Why? I think Raven's nice."  
  
I smile, sidling closer to the human, "Why thank you little morsel." I drape my arm around the boys shoulders and lick my lips as I stare challengingly at the girl.  
  
Jun's eyes widen, "I said NOW."  
  
"Geez, no need to get stroppy. What is it, that time of the month?" My talking man slips out of my almost embrace, "Well it was nice meeting you. Too bad I didn't get to hear the end of your story. You'd better go though, you don't want Jun to go all evil-eye on your ass."  
  
I smirk, "Indeed. It was a pleasure meeting you Daisuke," I bend to kiss his hand again, this time he doesn't pull away although he blushes, and I don't release his hand, waiting for him to look up at me.  
  
Jun rips his hand out of my grip and glares at me.  
  
"Goodbye Daisuke, Jun," I leer, "Till we meet again."  
  
I turn and stride away, smirking to myself as I walk towards the boy's apartment. I check the address on the driver's license I'd stolen from the boy's wallet again, still rather pleased with myself, pick-pocketing was so much easier when you could move at the speed of light.  
  
I let myself into his house, and make myself at home. He seems to be a neat housekeeper, something I've always approved of. When he arrives home I think I'll complement him on it.  
  
It is almost 3 hours later that Daisuke arrives home.  
  
"Dude! What are you doing here?" He asks.  
  
I smile and hold out his wallet.  
  
"I dropped it? Again? Damn, I should keep this on a chain. Thanks for bringing it back, it's really nice of you. Jun's totally wrong about you being a bad person."  
  
"Thank you. Your house is very clean."  
  
He blinks, "Er, thanks, I think."  
  
"I also came to finish my story, we were, interrupted."  
  
He flushes lightly, "Yeah, sorry about that. Jun's really rude sometimes."  
  
"Indeed. I believe I'd reached the part about Hiltz's banishment, correct?"  
  
The boy nods, "Yeah. So what happened next?"  
  
"Ah, life was good, as it should have been. Prozen seemed truly apologetic for what Hiltz had done to me. He had been planning on changing me, of course, but much later, when I'd had the chance to experience my humanity. For a few years at least we lived in harmony. And then I met him. We were living in Vienna at the time. It started innocently enough, I suppose. The servants speculated as to why Prozen and I only ever came out at night. The most far fetched of their ideas was surprisingly the truth." A soft smile graces my lips as I reminisce, "His name was Van, and he was beautiful inside as well as out."  
  
Daisuke lets out a soft sigh of contentment as he leans forward to hear more.  
  
"In a way I suppose you remind me of him, and perhaps that is why I chose to talk to you of all people. He was the lucky servant chosen to discern the truth of the rumours, but instead he fell in love with me, and I with him. He was my first love, and we were very happy together, so happy that I told him the truth about me. So happy that I broke Prozen's only rule and changed him into one of us, and Van accepted it too. We were going to spend eternity together. But that was not meant to be."  
  
"What happened?" He cries.  
  
I have to keep a tight hold on my emotions, it has been many years but... it still hurts, "Hiltz found me again, and he was jealous, insanely so. It was the very night that I made Van, we had shared the blood only once, we were going to do it the second time when I was torn away from my beloved, and he was there. He smiled at me, even though it never reached his eyes, and then he spoke, his tone icy cold," I carefully recall his exact words - words which have been etched into my mind, "'I'm very disappointed with you. You are mine, I thought you understood that. I guess I'm going to have to teach you a lesson that you'll never forget.' He slammed me against the wall, temporarily paralysing me so that I would be unable to move, to help, when he bent over my Van, and snapped his neck. He left me helpless to even look away when he sunk his teeth into the throat of Van's dead body. And when he kissed me, the taste of Van's blood was still in his mouth. 'You are mine, only mine,' He whispered before he sank his teeth into my neck as well." I realise I may have to explain, "You see, to drink the blood of another vampire, without permission, is like the worst form of rape. Rape of the mind. I would have died that day from lack of blood if Prozen hadn't found me, I couldn't find the words to tell him what had happened. I couldn't break his heart like mine had been broken, so for the first time in my life, I lied to my father, and told him I did not know who had attacked me, or why."  
  
I think my mortal is crying, and I suddenly realise with a kind of empty pain that I long ago forgot how to cry myself. I cast my mind back, and I realise I have never cried for my lost love, I have never cried at all.  
  
"I do not know what Hiltz did with the body of my first love, for though I saw him again, neither he nor I ever spoke of the incident, or of Van, and it seemed to me almost as if Van had never existed at all. Even now I sometimes doubt, for perhaps it was too perfect to be real. Still we were happy together, and I doubt I will ever forget him."  
  
Daisuke sighs, "That was really romantic," He exclaims, "Apart from the whole snapping his neck thing. I guess he was your one true love, and you've been alone since his death."  
  
I smile at his naivety and shake my head, "No. I have had many lovers since his death, but he will always be my first, just as Thomas is my last." I say this with absolute certainty, knowing that if I lost Thomas there could be no other.  
  
"So, after Van died, you just came here?"  
  
I laugh and shake my head again, "You must keep in mind that this happened over a hundred years ago. After Van's death, we moved to Paris, and there I became a recluse, so Prozen in his infinite wisdom found me a companion - a sister. Her name was Reese, and she was the 13-year-old daughter of a witch. I hated her from the moment I first laid eyes upon her, because I knew that she loved my father more then I. She was a beautiful child, as I had been beautiful as a child. Prozen had an eye for beauty, and he picked his children well, which made me wonder why he loved Hiltz. I think that perhaps once Hiltz was beautiful, or maybe it was only to me that he was ugly, because I knew what lurked in the depths of his soul. I had felt it when our minds had touched. It was only when Hiltz returned, bearing gifts and spouting meaningless words that I finally bonded with the girl, for she too saw his nature, or perhaps she only saw how much Prozen cared for the foul creature."  
  
"So you two had sex," He surmised.  
  
I pull a face, "No. We merely decided to band together for mutual protection. She came to me, her long hair tangled around her face, and told me that Hiltz had kissed her. I said before she was beautiful, for a child, and when she said this I knew what Hiltz planned, and I would not let it happen again, so I made a pact with her. Hiltz would never get either of us alone, and from that moment on we were inseparable. Prozen was delighted that we'd finally connected, as the brother and sister he'd wanted us to be."  
  
I pause, remembering, "It was her 23rd birthday when Prozen changed her, he threw a huge gala, and it was that night, after we had fed on the blood of a thousand innocents that I shared blood with her for the first time. Her mind was calm, and comforting, even the fiery magic she possessed had a tranquil effect upon others. After we shared our blood, we were even closer. Closer then any brother and sister pair probably should be. I'll admit now, although she does not remember it, we kissed, for comfort, and reassurance. It was not sexual, but we loved each other. I think I loved her even more then I loved Prozen."  
  
"Woah, that's just freaky dude! I could never kiss Jun, I mean sick!" He pulls an amusing face, and I chuckle, he could make me laugh, I'll give him that.  
  
"I think you're forgetting that she was not really my sister, but you're right too, it sometimes scared me, the depth of my feelings for her. Perhaps even more so the night we made love."  
  
The mortal chokes, and his eyes launch out of his head, "You... had sex with your sister!"  
  
"Again I remind you she was not really my sister, and yes, we did. Hiltz walked in just before we came. I think, I hope in fact, that it hurt him to hear us cry each others names as we released. He never spoke to us of it, and he never told Prozen, for which I am grateful. Again, I could not have explained my actions. It was about 2 years after our first and only sexual experience with each other that Hiltz turned her into a monster. I do not know how he did it, only that it was he who stole the precious memories of our time as lovers, and stole the softness in Reese that I have always loved. He explained this change to Prozen as an attack from witches, and Reese did not deny it, but I knew his handiwork when I felt it, and I could not forgive him. She was never the same again."  
  
The human growled and cracked his knuckles, "I so want to kill this guy!"  
  
I smirk, "No need. We felt the same as you. We'd had enough of Hiltz's games, and Reese plotted his death, he'd shaped her mind too well, and I was horrified when she came to me with the plans she'd made for Prozen. She offered me the role of Hiltz's murderer, but I knew I could not play the part. I simply watched in silent shock as she drugged him, and ripped out his heart, and ate it while he was still alive. Deep down in my mind I was glad she did it, because even after everything Hiltz had done to me, I could not have done something so cruel, and it pleased me to see him suffer. I did not kill Prozen, like she asked me, instead I told him that we were leaving, and that if he valued his life he would not follow. I know that I hurt him, I could see it on his face, and this in turn hurt me, but it was for the best. It would have hurt him more had he learnt what we'd become. And when we left, I made a silent promise, to one day return. Reese does not hate Prozen, she merely wished the job to be done thoroughly, and she asked me to kill Prozen because she could not have done it herself."  
  
"Dude!" My human exclaims, "That was majorly fucked up. You should talk to someone about this"  
  
I scowl, "I am."  
  
"Oh. Okay. So that was when you came to Japan, right?"  
  
"After a long period of aimless wandering, yes. It was here in Japan that I met my bond mate, Thomas."  
  
"So, you, ah, still swing that way then?"  
  
"Do you?" I ask. He blushes,  
  
"Ah, well, it's kinda... why don't you tell me about Thomas."  
  
It seems my human is less than subtle, still Thomas is a subject I never grew tired of, "He is wonderful, there is no other way I can say it. Ruthless, yet sensitive. Naïve, yet wise, and beautiful yet, oh well he's just beautiful. His ridiculously untidy hair always seems to beckon me, and it never ceases to amuse me to see it resist Reese's admirable attempts to tame it." I smile fondly, "Many jars of hair wax have been lost in that untameable forest of hair. Sometimes I think his hair shows his true nature - the nature one only sees when they get him naked in the bed chamber-"  
  
"Fast-forward!" The mortal cuts me off, "I really don't wanna hear this, just skip forward, what happened to Reese?"  
  
I smile tenderly. "She too has found a bond-mate. Fiona, she is light where Reese is dark. In a way I suppose she reminds me of how Reese was before Hiltz changed her."  
  
"So this is the happily ever after, eh? You all found your perfect match?"  
  
I shrug, "If that's what you wish to call it. I fear I have been replaced. Reese changed a talking-man barely a week ago. My Thomas has taken," I swallow my hurt, "great interest in the boy."  
  
His brow crinkles, "If he doesn't see what a great guy you are then he doesn't deserve you."  
  
"Thank you," I whisper, "You have helped me a great deal."  
  
He throws his arms around me, and I feel something wet trailing down my face, "Am I crying?" I whisper wonderingly.  
  
"Yeah, but that's okay, everyone's allowed to cry."  
  
I didn't even realise I'd spoken aloud. My original plan comes back to me, and I press my lips to the boys throat, then I bite down.  
  
It's late when we return to the coven house, Ken and Thomas are on the couch together, but when I walk in Thomas leaps up and rushes over to me.  
  
"Raven, where have you been? I was so worried."  
  
I immediately feel guilty for doubting him, and I capture his lips in a kiss.  
  
"I was getting something off my chest." I pause, "And I brought someone home, everyone this is Daisuke, my psychic."  
  
Ken stared at Daisuke, "Hi," He smiled, "I'm Ken."  
  
A blush spread over Daisuke's cheeks, one that I was fast becoming accustomed too, "Hey Beautiful, do you believe in love at first sight, or do you want me to walk in again?"  
  
To my surprise Ken's cheeks go red as well. "Once is enough," He retorted tartly, leaving the room at a run.  
  
I laugh, "Maybe you are good for something."  
  
My youngest child pokes out his tongue at me.  
  
"You should only poke that out if your prepared to use it," teases Thomas.  
  
Daisuke snaps his mouth shut, "I'm sorry, but, the hair remark. I just can't get it out of my head."  
  
I glare at him. He smiles back.  
  
"What hair remark?" Asks Thomas curiously.  
  
"Never mind," I tell him, dragging him towards our bedroom, "I haven't seen you all day, it's going to take us all night to make up for that."  
  
I think I'll leave Reese and Fiona to deal with our new housemate, maybe he can share with Ken. I smirk evilly, two birds with one stone. Suddenly my future seems a lot brighter.  
  
Authors Notes: Er... Where the HELL did the Raven/Hiltz come from? And the Reese/Raven queerness. *Shudders* I so did not write this - I blame my muse *Glares* I hate you, and there will be NO sequel. This is finally done. I don't care if I have LOTS of sequel ideas thanks to you, I'm NOT writing one.  
  
K-chan: Everyone review and ask for a sequel, then she'll have to do it. Don't you WANT to see Prozen again? The stupid bitch totally left this open for the sequel we've got all planned out - tell her to write it!  
  
FireDemon: Omae o koruso. There is no sequel. Nobody wants a sequel. I'm just going to ignore you and respond to my reviews -  
  
Little Buddy - You reviewed! You read one of my slashy fics, one with Reese/Ryss in it no less (I know how much you dislike her - trying to steal *our* Raven). I am in shock (and I'm flattered - *grins*) Thank you *so* much for reading (and reviewing) *gigglz*  
  
Naomi Hunter - I'm glad you liked it *grins*  
  
Plink - I'm sorry *blushes* I totally shouldn't have taken Anne Rice's ideas/story etc. I'm a huge fan of hers, and her vampires are the way I see vampires, although mine in this are a little different. I only stole one line from Queen of the Damned, I was watching my DVD just before I started writing for inspiration, and that line was stuck in my head. So again, I apologise. I steal everything. Did I get more away from it this chapter? I'm trying *very* hard not to make my vampires carbon copies of Anne Rice's, but I'm a bad, bad idea/plot/character thief. I even stole my psychiatrists/psychics, all three of them (Does that make this a crossover? It wasn't supposed to be *sighs*). I'm too lazy to make up original characters.  
  
Diamond-sama - I'm flattered, and I'm going to use this opportunity to BEG you to continue The Ties That Bind *Puts on the Puppy Dog Eyes* It's my favouritest Beyblades fic in the history of all Beyblades fics. It has bondage, ^_^ and Rei-torture. Please write chapter 6???  
  
Maelgwyn - Oh thank you so much for your lovely review. I'm glad you liked it. Write another chapter from Kens POV? Heh heh... I'm kinda flat out with schoolwork. I never have any inspiration *sighs* and I barely ever get the chance to even read other peoples fics!!! Besides this chapter is long enough to make up for the lack of a fifth chapter - right?  
  
By the way - the Japanese: Ojiisan means Grandfather. Obasan means aunt. I like Japanese. 


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